Moving
Along
Several
readers have enquired how it came to pass that I have moved home so many times
in recent years. I can tell you that few moves were made by personal choice,
but rather dictated by circumstances. The current tally is 10 homes in 8 years
– which is pretty stupid really!
I’ll begin
by leaving Stourbridge in the
Over the
years I had vaguely wondered about going to University and doing a degree of
some description. Years ago this was in ecology and environmental sciences –
but when I examined the job market there was not much chance of any worthwhile
career arising from the studies. I binned that option way back then. I had
always been extremely interested in nuclear physics, but when I looked around
for courses there simply weren’t any associated even obliquely in my personal
areas of interest. However, whilst I had been working in the
I really
enjoyed University life and made many new and lasting friends. I also gave some
free time to act as a student ambassador, a posh title for showing prospective
students around and selling the University to them. This got me known around
all the
Meanwhile I
still had another year of studies ahead, and whilst foreign students living in
the Beaconside houses were allowed to stay for two years, I as a native British
student was required to move into private accommodation. I queried this with
the housing office, pointing out I was a mature student. Their reply was the
standard “It is our policy for all (Native) students to spend their second year
in private housing. This lets them experience the rigors of short term rental,
which in turn prepares them for after they leave University.” I tried to point
out I had already experienced this many times, but to no avail … apparently it
was deemed good for my personal development. Some student buddies of mine
rented a place down
It is then
you realise what a ball-ache moving is. I hired a van (£30) and student friends
Mike and Gez helped me move my stuff. Well, what there was of it – as living in
one room meant a lot of it was still in boxes scattered around the country. I
had to cancel the internet, then get reconnected – I mean, a student studying
mobile computing with websites as a second does require constant internet
access. The low and behold, the infamous TV Licencing people decreed that
because this house was rented to 5 different student tenants, that is required
5 different TV licences – at £ 76 each. Cummon, we students don’t have much
money spare, and what we do have will be spent on more useful things like:
cigarettes, beer, and girls. To be honest, a lot of mine actually went on
computer peripherals and software for my courses of study.
So another
academic year comes to pass, and I hang out a lot with Max from
My studies
went very well, and I was headed a First. I had moved over to more website
orientated studies as the semesters passed by, something I really enjoyed, and
was also very good at. I (Along with Mike) was one of only 5 students from the
entire year to complete all 15 exercises in Java coding. Not bad for an old man
of 50 eh! My friendship with Max also grew, and we became the social animals at
student disco’s and student union events. I did not press my presence, unless
invited; as being a lot older than most I did not want to spoil what they were
enjoying by forcing myself into social situations. I think they adopted me as a
fun old guy and good for a laugh. Neither was I at all interested in ‘hitting’
on any of the females, although occasionally a look in their eye gave away more
information than it should.
Exams were
over by the beginning of July, so I had several weeks to chill before my
impending departure for
Returning
to Stafford a few days before my departure for
Arriving to
the hottest place I have ever experienced in the world, I move into my new gaff
around 10am. All I have with me from my previous lives is one suitcase and a
load of memories. The flight was awful (Air
Much of my
time in
My contract
is slightly vague, but I am here in a town called Long Jiang for the next 12 to
16 months. Immediately we are into a 5-week Summer Camp and concurrent English
Speaking Competition. August simply vanishes within the blink of an eye,
although I do spend 5-days in
By then I
was long-gone. My first lesson in Chinese business was that contracts don’t
mean a thing; and are basically the starting point from which Chinese bosses begin
to change things to their own advantage. This contrasts so markedly with the
hard working staff whom are so genuine and helpful. Having completed all the
work of my contract by mid January 2005, I received a txt message on 19th
stating that from the end of the month I was no longer employed. I was not due
back in
Well,
that’s an unexpected problem then.
I basically
get wrecked that night, and find I am left with 8 days within which time to
find new digs. In
Now all I
had to do was get my stuff moved. I talked to the owner of the local bar I
used, and he came to the rescue. Therefore on the 28th January he
and the manager of a local brewery rocked up in a small truck, and we all
worked to make my move as smooth as possible. They wouldn’t even accept any
money from me, so I treated them dinner back in Longjiang. Did you know that
Chinese bar owners and brewery managers are quite good at drinking beer? Well,
I don’t remember getting home that night, but recollect having a mother of a
hangover the next midday. Sure, we all had a great time that night – which was
also my send-off party.
Around 2pm on
28th, the apartment landlady shows up with one of the directors, and
they basically check and decide everything is ok. I hand over the keys and
depart for my new gaff in Foshan. This year my removals clash quite badly with
Chinese New Year, which is the one time all Chinese go home to be with family.
It is my first time, and I worry about finding suitable supplies. Therefore I
drop by several retailers before heading to my new home, stocking up with
essentials like: cigarettes, beers, and pot noodles. As it happens, I needn’t
have worried because it turned out
I take with
me in my heart several new friends, most notable of which are: Jane, the office
manageress; Uncle Sam, who we learn a lot more about later; Kenny, Step, Jeff
from Oz, Folora, and Caroline – an English teacher who leaves Longjing a few
days after I do. She has two weeks associated holiday at the end of her
contract, but is no longer allowed to stay at the school she has taught in – so
she bases herself at my new gaff, and goes off exploring China with her
boyfriend Chris. My guanxi or network of friends also includes: Harvey Wu,
Nancy Wu, office girls Sue and Yuki, The bar owner, several Chinese English
teachers, Men Gai – the owner of the first streetbar I frequented, Andy and
Hervey – two lads from my first night in China when I went ‘walkabout’, and
many others too numerous to mention.
Arriving in
Foshan I am well settled in the new gaff, which lies on ‘Moi Gui Dong Lo’. You
could probably play football in the living room, and the three bedrooms are all
at least double bed size. The kitchen is western, and there is also a wash area
and two bathrooms, with shower. My deal was made with a guy who appeared to be
from Hog Kong, whilst I usually pay Ivy, who has spent 2 years studying at
University in
During this
time three important others come into my life. The first is Eason, and he is a
designer of condominiums and interiors. We meet one evening by chance at a
local streetbar, and later over the years our friendship developes into that
of ‘Brothers’. I learn a great deal
about China and being Cantonese from him, supplemented with lots of beer,
girls, and local food. The second is Candy + her husband Lawrence. I have the
greatest respect for Candy because she taught herself English! Later she
becomes a central member of China Expat’s, and also becomes Dave’s main person
in China. Dave arrives first in February 2007, and he is from Stafford, and
even played squash at the same places I did, at the same time. However, we had
never met before = how odd? We source for him and develop to loading containers
and handling all his exports – in company with Step from Longjiang. We have a
great team setup, and Dave soon becomes another true friend. As is my way in
life – we all interact with each other, Eason taking over nightime drinking
duties on behalf of Candy. We are
all very close and have a great circle of friends and lifestyle.
Accommodation
problems begin the October of 2006, when my new Thai girlfriend Yupa is
visiting for the second time. I go into the meeting expecting to sign for
another 12 months. The
During the
intervening period I enjoy life, and Yupa moves on with her life (We are still
good friends, but her life is in
Come October, and Mr Toad is back for
more. He opens this time by stating the new rent is now Y3, 000 per month, and
no offers! I repeat the terms of our last agreement, being Y2, 600 fixed for
2-years. They say it was never so, and whilst Ivy hides behind the knowledge
that I am correct (Her face gives her away), her ‘brother’ proffers his
smarmiest smile and looks just like a fat toad at a bug festival. His demeanour
is that of Jabba the Hutt, and knowing these lies were coming, I play a small part
in his self-efficating mockery. I
make a comment about Chinese being deceitful and having no face, to which Ivy
squirms, and toad-boy smiles. No way am I accepting this type of treatment, and
so we agree to differ. Ivy then states I have to move out as they need the
place for their parents (Who actually live in another apartment a few floors
below). Chinese shenanigans at work, and I am not that stupid. I say ‘OK’, and
ask to extend our current agreement until the end of the year – at the existing
monthly rent. I have a lot going on right now and moving complicates things
greatly for me. They are not happy, but it appears to suit all of us. We agree
to two months held at the same rental, and off they go! We will move out around
Christmas then.
This is a
record of sorts, as I have lived in the same apartment (March 2005 to December
2007) for 34 months!
I later
verified that this apartment was left empty for the next 2-years at least. You
see, rather than rent at less than the most modern of housings rental prices,
Chinese landlords would prefer to have no rent. This is their face. If they
rent for a lower price then they give their face away. To me it is plain
bonkers.
So between
Christmas and New Year 2007, in between playing Father Christmas at the local
restaurant for kid’s parties, and loading a container bound for
Due to
logistics we actually sign for the new apartment on the 17th, but
specify we won’t move in until the 27th at earliest. This suits the
new landlady very fine, as she still has some work to do and things to supply.
Therefore, whilst the contract is physically singed on the 17th, it
is only effective from 27th. Well, that is what is stated in black
and white. I pay two months in advance as deposit + one months rent. We get the
keys around Christmas day, and actually move beginning on the 27th.
It takes a few days, as we are basically carrying everything over the flat roof
on floor 4, a suitcase at a time. This is at 3 am by the way. By 29th
I have to order Siu Ying to find a couple of beefy likely lads to hump the
heavy stuff over, which she does and we are moved. This is detailed in missive
“7 Days Before Christmas 2007”.
We live
there for the next 20 months, until such time as the credit crisis has taken
deep root, the Beijing Olympic madness has seen the price of visa’s sky-rocket,
and with the RMB rising and Pound falling … something had to give! Our
landlady, an English teacher who can’t speak any English, lost a lot of money
through the financial crisis, and wants to replace it from us. We are also
suffering, and it’s the new and ridiculously expensive, short-term only visa’s
- more than any other factor that, are making my life hell.
The Chinese
reacted to the financial crisis (Their first), by completely stopping spending
any money. Restaurants closed and my burgeoning business simply stopped dead!
Instead, any spare money was immediately put into savings accounts. My Landlady
then began altering our contract, so that rent was due on 17th, and
not 27th. Then we sort of lost a month, as the month I paid for in
advance, became the current month (OK), which then became last month – she was
using the 17th to do this. I tried to set Siu Ying on the task, but
ultimately had to concede that without Chinese litigation, I was going to loose
1-months rent to her … simply because she needed the money for her ‘Face’. You
can perhaps tell I am becoming slightly jaundiced now by Chinese contracts and
landlords/ladies.
Come June
2009 I have had enough and am looking to move = anywhere else! I settle on the
This is all
detailed in my
This is
complicated by the fact she is very pregnant – but hasn’t bothered to tell me
yet … even though I support her and ask how our baby is doing? What a bizarre
world I appear to inhabit. But life is also good and now our finances are
finally under our control, we can begin to enjoy life a lot more.
Whilst my
wife and I were both born into farming communities, we are basically city
people these days. I did find the island retreat to be very stimulating and
peaceful – so much so it was very easy to set time aside to write these
missives, or pick up the guitar and play. Whilst I retain a 5-year lease on the
island home (Now sublet to Uncle Sam), family logistics with a new baby needing
both Mother and Father present prompted our latest and hopefully last move.
This also has a lot to do with Chinese culture, because any newborn baby is
normally looked after by its Grandmother. Therefore Siu Ying basically left our
island home in February 2010 and never returned. She stayed with her Mother,
learning how to be a Mother herself. As a couple, it was very difficult for us
to be separated for so long, and again, somehing had to give!
This
prompted our move to Toisan City, a short bus ride from her Mother’s home,
whilst offering us city life as a family of three. Our new gaff is so similar
to those of Foshan, but comes at a fraction of the monthly cost, and basically
it has 5 bedrooms! I really like it here, and city streets suit us all well. We
are so central to everything of any consequence to our daily lives that the
living is easy, and the rice is high.
Adding-up
and that comes to 9 homes within 8 and a bit years. Perhaps I forgot about one?
It’s still a lot by anyone’s standards I am sure. I really hope this one lasts,
if simply because I am really fed up with moving all the time!